Two angels kick'n my ass!

So this is the first time that this whole healthy lifestyle has come back and kicked my ass!! LOL!!! I am doing surprisingly well with keeping up the good food habits while pregnant. Although I must say I HAVE eaten things that I wouldn't normally have and it is a lot harder to not give into the cravings while pregnant (and more often I have given in these days). However all I have to compare to is the last times I was pregnant and I am leaps and bounds in a better place then then. For example even though I am 23weeks (6mths) right now I am still 109lbs LESS then I was last time....gulp....gosh! Just remembering how that felt makes me feel like...WHOA! So as you all know this has all rubbed off on my kids and the other night we had ordered pizza. By the Mon there was still a can of ginger ale left. So after school I got the kids their snack and I grabbed some clementines and the can of ginger ale and sat down to eat with them. As I am taking a sip of the pop my youngest says, " Mommy the baby doesn't like that, it's too spicy" Then my oldest says, "Yes Mommy that's not good for you or the baby"...........I just sat there looking at them thinking, "How do I explain pregnant craving to these two?!" LOL! I did admit that it is a sometimes food and that yes it's not the best thing for me or the baby to have. I was then bombarded with, "Mommy don't have that then the baby doesn't like it!", "Yeah Mommy maybe you shouldn't be drinking that!", "The baby is just little and you have to give it's body healthy food", "Yeah Mommy we have to help the baby be heathy" .....o.....k boy did I feel like a smuck! BUT I still wanted to drink the pop!! LOL!...when you get a taste that you want while pregnant you HAVE to have it!! So I said they were right and pushed it aside with a little tear in my eye...cause I still wanted to drink it!, it was the hardest thing I have had to do in awhile LOL!! So my two healthy angels were kicking this prego Mama's ass.....makes me SO proud xoxoxo 'Live in YOUR Awesome'

A body in motion.....

....stays in motion. This is what I am finding as this belly grows! I've learned that there's more to exercise then just the exercise. I am not able to go at the pace I was before or do the things that I have done before but the main point is to stay in motion and feel awesome! I find that the days that I do exercise I feel the most 'un-pregnant' and for the rest of the day I am able to move around well and don't have the normal aches and pains of pregnancy. So I get asked a lot about what kind of 'training' I am doing. Just to clear that up, I am not really 'training' anymore I am more just keeping my body moving in ways that it has before so it doesn't forget and because mentally it makes me feel better :) So I'm not doing it for a high calorie burn or to lose weight or to beat a time or to go hard. I am not able to run anymore so I go out with the dog and walk as far as I need/able to and it feels so great to be out in the fresh air and see all the nice fall colours.

I also go to the gym and either do a cardio and core class (with modifications of course) or I go on the upright bike (20min) then on the Cross-trainer (20min) and then laps in the pool (20min). After the first time I did my laps I text my coach saying, "When I swim I feel like a happy baby seal then when I get out of the pool and gravity kicks in again, I feel like a beached whale" LOL!!! So this week will be climbing the stairs at Chedoke. They are 300+ stairs that go up the escarpment and I will see how many times I can do it....update to come later ;) This weekend we had some really warm weather and so we took the kids out to Crawford lake and we hiked around it twice and through the forest there and back (2+hrs). As I was walking I thought to myself, "OMG! I could never have or never even wanted to have done this the last two times I was 5mths pregnant" It was really cool to be able to still be out with the family and enjoying the day.

So my goal continues to be finding ways to keep moving and feeling good about it, I am also open for suggestions!! :-D 'Live in YOUR Awesome!'

Bringing the family along....

So at the end of 2010, Phat Chicks put up an "I will.... in 2011" statement on their Facebook page asking us to fill in the blank. After my experience of that first year of being active and seeing who was still left standing beside me as a support I realized just who the most important players were in my life. I know that we always say "family comes first" and "family is the most important thing" but this experience really made it hit home in my heart. So the above was my "I will" and that is just what I did. I signed up for races that only had the kids 1k fun run first, so the whole family could be involved. I traded out trail rides with the girls on the weekends and did bike rides with the family instead, and I asked my hubby to be my partner in the Rockstar Adventure Race that year. I also got my oldest son to join me on my short runs (I ran while he rode his bike) Now the side effect of this was that I am not as strong or fast as I use to be, but I am and other around me are happy :) Although for 2012 I never officially said this was going to still be my goal. I have kept it in mind and still have the sign on my fridge. This year in fact it has happened even more then I realized it could :) Hubby and I ended up doing back to back weekend racing together this summer and for my last race of the year, The Island Girl race. My Mom and sister came out to do it too!! They walked the 10.5k together while I did it running...well the last 3k I had to walk...but more on that in min :)

I had the boys involved in making signs for the me and the other Mommy's/Babe's in Motion and it was awesome the boys LOVED doing this. They kept saying to me, "This is SO much fun right!?!!!" "This is going to be awesome right!???"" LOL! They even LOVED the fact that on race day I gave them party horns and said, "Blow them as loud as you can for as long as you want today!"....they looked at me wide eyed in amazement and said, " COOL!!! OK!" It's been so great being in motion as a family we've had so much fun that we have decided to add another little Van Awesome to the team!! :-O

.....so while I was doing all this stuff through the summer I was also bringing another 'someone' along with me....I am currently 4 1/2 months pregnant!!!! :-D

(hence the reason why I had to walk the last 3k in the final race) We are SO excited and the this pregnancy has been such a majorly different experience for me. Health wise, body wise and attitude wise as well. I have been checking in with my Doctor all along the way because YES I have been pregnant all summer and all through the Triathlon training and all the races I did. But I did everything at a very comfortable pace and listened to my body, when I needed to rest I did, when I had to walk I did and when I had to stop I did. My attitude about it all is that I am not out to win gold but just to stay in motion :-)

"Live in YOUR Awesome!!"

Du-ing a personal best!

No I didn't make a spelling mistake in the title of this post read on and you will understand! So the summer of 2012 Triathlon training with Mommy's/Babe's in Motion as their Assistant Coach is over!!! WOW! 14 weeks just goes so fast and of course this year brought new people, new experiences and awesomeness into my life. I was SO hounored that these ladies embraced me as one of their coaches this year and trusted me to help lead them in their journey. I don't think we didn't have a night where tears were not shed by someone, including me :) Tears of frustration turning into tears of 'I did it!!', tears of fear turned into tears of "I'm doing this!' and of course tears of laughter :-D I looked forward to every Tues night and being able to watch in awww as these woman went out of their comfort zones and lived 'out of the box' with us all for 2hrs. I loved seeing each week seeing their confidence and abilities grow. Some ladies who were scared shitless of even riding their bike on the road never mind up the hills and 15k out and back at the start of training changed into woman who rode their bikes out to meet us to train and then rode their bikes home!! :-O So wicked!!! Some ladies at the start struggled with even running around the whole race track and at the end of the season they were telling me, " I just have one more lap to do" and this was after they had already run 2-3 laps already!!!! I also added in another day to train because I wanted to make sure I got out on one day of the weekend. So we meet Sun mornings to do a bike (hill repeats) and run. I really enjoyed the Sun mornings as well as it was always a smaller group and I got a chance to get to know some of the ladies better and the roads were nice and quite then too. They always thanked me for being out there with them and I always let them know that it was my pleasure! I really felt like the lucky one as I was no longer just having my journey but I got to share in 97 other woman's journeys too. Sooooo 3 days before the race Kelso had to close their water because it was too low and therefore high in bacteria....what does that mean for the race you ask? Well that means that instead of doing a Triathlon (Swim/bike/run) we all now had to do a Duathlon!! (run/bike/run)....oooooooooo...kkkkkkkkkk. 12hrs before the race I had to let the ladies know this news. There was mixed emotions about it but I think the biggest one was defiantly disappointment :/ including myself and mostly I was sad. Not for me and how my goals for the race were out the window but for all the ladies who had their goals and got ready all summer for this. The swimmers were sad cause that was their strong sport, the runners were sad cause they weren't going to over come the challenge of the swim and the none runners were not looking forward to running so much. As their Coach I wanted to stay positive for them but something I think the would like more was honest....so I said that I was disappointed too HOWEVER this was NOT going to take us down and that we would Du this and be awesome!

The ladies pulled it together that morning and there were SO many purple shirts in the crowed it was awesome and everyone cheered on everyone else at the start, during the race, on the side lines, as people headed out on the bike, came in on the bike, on the run, heading up the 'big ass hill', and heading up the 'big ass hill' AGAIN!!! So as Coach Nancy said, " No one had ever done a Duathlion before so we all got a personal best that day!!!"

Back to back awesome!

So we just had back to back weekend races....woooooo, tired, but FUN! Hubby ad I don't go out to the movies and we don't go out to dinner. The only time we have my parents/friends watch the kids is if we both have to work OR if we are racing together....cause that's seems to be what we do now :)

On Sat July, 21 we did a race that is new to us this year. I had heard about it from some girls friends that did it last year and asked hubby if he wanted to try it out. It's called the Warrior Dash and it's a 5k course at Horseshoe Vally with obstacles you have to go through it as you go along, including a fire pit jump and mud pit at the end. What was neat about this race was that it was a first for both hubby and I, where before he had joined in on races I had already done. We hooked up my Dad this weekend to watch the boys and shipped them off from Fri night until Sun morning!! Kid free all weekend...I don't care what we are doing, I call that a romantic weekend away :)

So during the race we just took our time. It was hot and we had to head straight UP, UP, UP the ski hills to start. At each obstacle we would stop and take pictures of each other and just took our time and enjoyed our self :)....at one point we were walking along the path for awhile and I turned to hubby and said, "So what's new?!" LOL!

At the end we did the fire pit jump and went hardcore crawl through the mud pit and crossed the finish line holding muddy hands :) xoxo

We then got sprayed down by the fireman and changed into dry clothes and sat and enjoyed a big turkey leg Warrior style :)

This past weekend we did our 4hr RockStar Adventure Race as Team Van Awesome!! Once again shipped the kids off to my Moms this time on the Fri night and headed out early Sat morning on the 3hr drive just to get to the race site. The weather was beautiful and we were in good spirits and excited. This year they changed what happen at the start of the race. So we were given our stage 2 map ahead of time so that we could map out where we wanted to go and what points we were going to collect. 15min before race start they gave us the stage 1 map that we had to complete first and get 2 flags. The first one, one of us had to run a trail and get the red flag in the waist deep water. Hubby looked at me and said, " You can run!" LOL!....once I did that we both had to hop on our bikes and go counter clock wise through a path the get the 2nd flag......now I have run this path before and knew that it was pretty rough going. LOL!! Oh man it was hard and tiring and the race started at 2pm so it was hot out!

We passed one girl on the path throwing-up :S...a few people changing their tire from the flat they got and some people were breaking out the first-Aid kit!!! I said to my husband at one point, " You forget how hard this is until you get out here again eh!"...it took us the first 1hr to get through that run/bike part but we pulled over on the path a few times to sit in the shade and take off our helmets for a good 5min to try and cool off and catch our breath.

Although we had 2L each of water in our Camlbak's it gets all warm from being against our backs, so it wasn't very refreshing!......once we were done that I suggested that we go do the underwater points so I could dive down into the lake and cool off....that was a good plan. Once I did that I felt great. So we jumped in the canoe and went out to get our other points. The day ended up going really well for us. We got all but one of the points we planned to get (20pts) and we finished with 5mins to spare. So out of a possible 800 and something point we got 580 :)

Once again we sat and had our victory dinner together....now normally I don't like ice cream, but they had that for desserts and I had a big bowl of it and it was the best thing I EVER tasted after everything we had just done!! LOL!!! WOOOOOO HOOOOOO For Team VanAwesome!!

It's funny, as I have been telling people that we just did a 4hr race, they are most impressed with my husband and how he kept up to me! LOL!!....guess I'll take that as a complement :).....but I must say it is pretty cool being out there with my best-ist friend xoxoxox Live in YOUR Awesome!!

Even a cheerleader needs a cheerleader

So I had another first last Sun :) The week before I had a bit of a down week...and it's funny I do get asked, " Is everyday awesome for you!?" and no not EVERY day. The kids were sick, I was sick and my mind just started to head into the gutter :( So when I heard that Coach Nancy was going to do a race simulation on Sun morning I knew that was JUST what I needed to get this head out of the funk a good swim/bike/run :)...."Ok I'll join you guys on Sunday" I say,"Great!" Says Nancy, " We will be swimming 1k, bike 30k and running 5k"........WTF!! Are you kidding me!? I haven't even done a race that long!!!!....but here's the thing about me now, this journey has changed not just my outsides but my insides too. I now stick to something when I say that I will do it....and CRAP! I just said that I would join them on Sunday morning at 8am for race simulation!!....what!....why!!....huh!?....why are they going so far you ask? It's because those people are training for Olympic distance and Half Iron man distance races! Well I have only done a Sprint distance.... So I was a little worried and I was dream/thinking about it all night. I taped the route of the bike ride on my bike and had my phone for GPS as I knew that I wasn't going to be able to keep up the group and would at one point be alone out there, which I am fine with, I just didn't want to get lost. So up I get a 7am (breaking my first rule of 'I don't do early') and packed up and ready to go. When I got there a was pleasantly surprised that I knew more then half the people there? And they were happy to see that I was joining them. I told them with a sigh and a bit of uncertainly that I'm not sure how I'll do as I haven't even done a race this far yet...."You're going to be awesome!" Says Morgan without a second to pause. " You're going to rock this!!" says Amanda right after her......my response was, "Well I don't think I will rock it, but I'll get it done"....however due to their warming welcoming and positive attitude I was already starting to feel like maybe this was doable for me :) Here is the picture we took before we started...I am in the middle and as you can see I don't have me big, 'this is going to be awesome' smile on...it's more like, 'oh crap! what have I gotten myself into?!'

So we get into the water....Lake Ontario, and you know then you have on the garden hose in your back yard and you're like, "WOW! That water is freezing!!" YUP! That was what the water felt like! (now breaking my 2nd rule, of 'I don't do cold'!!)..."Where is your wetsuit!?" everyone is asking me....I don't have one thank you very much. Even one of the men said to me, "You are braver then I am!"...all I could think was, "Buddy I don't have a choice!" So I was the first to start the swim...cause it was frigg'n cold and I just wanted to get it over with!!! As I started I could hear everyone cheering me on....it really made me feel great and I didn't know it....but I needed that! I don't know how to explain it without sounding snooty, but I seem to think that I don't need cheerleaders. Not because I am so good or anything but I think I just feel uncomfortable with it and feel that I have been out here doing it for awhile and I know what I am doing....so I'm good. Now I go and cheer on others and LOVE doing that. But I realized that morning that even a cheerleader needs a cheerleader :)....I am good to go out there on my own and I am able to do it on my own and get my butt up to go. But having others cheer you on and accepting it just makes the journey not so lonely and feel that much more awesome. (WOW! just got to say that I am getting all teary eyed typing this!) Now once I was done the swim the water was beautiful and even felt warm! Next was the bike and as we all hopped on our bikes they were all asking me why I didn't have clip ins!....I explained that I do the poor mans Triathlon!! LOL!! The bike ride was wicked and I never was alone out there I kept up to the big boys that day!!!No clip-in's and on my antique bike...boo-ya baby! This team that I trained with call themselves the Iron Canucks .... By the time we got back from the bike it was late morning and REALLY HOT!!! So the run kicked my ass....I was dying. I had to stop and walk a few times but I was in good company the whole way as I talked with one of the girls I had met for the first time that day. I told her a bit abut my story and she told me hers (she's a personal trainer too) So the training ended 3+hr later, 30+k moved, and over 1700 calories burned....and I felt AWESOME!!!!! just as I knew that I would and that is what motivated me to go out in the first place :)

He's Tri-ing on his own!! :-O

So it has been busy to say the least, hence not getting a chance to blog...GESH!! This weekend was totally awesome and I HAD to find a moment to share :) So it started off the the Meredith Hagan Inspiration Run. This is the run that came from my trainer that died in an accident 2 years ago. Her family and friends have made the Meredith Hagan foundation and they do the race to help raise money for different charities that Meredith supported. This race would make Meredith very happy and I can see her smile now. So I headed out early to help set up and then ran the 5k route which was a trail....it was, hard, hot and awesome! You can see the video I did of it here.

Mean while my hubby had to take the kids to get my 5yr race kit for his Triathlon for Sunday. So I notice when I got home that my sons race bib says that he is in the next age group up. Which means that he will also be doing a longer distance.....OH! So he was excited about the bike part being the longest, and he will get to do 1k this time. He LOVES the bike part and has talked about it from last year all year long.

Now what I didn't know was that I wasn't going to be able to do the race with him. So after he does his swim I pull him out of the pool and run around to meet him in the transition area (he got to put his bike in the transition area this year....SO cute!!) as I run into the area the marshals are yelling at me that I can't be in there and that they would help him. I told them that's fine but I just have to tell him that I won't be able to go with him, cause I prepped him that I was going to be there. So I run up to him and grab my stuff and say, "I can't go with you, they won't let me"....he says, "OK" and then heads off with his bike......well ok, no problem.

It was SO amazing to be able to watch him in the race this time. He bent down over his handle bars and stuck his elbows out and zoooom, gone!(later he told me doing that helps him go faster! LOL!) At one point he was so far out on the bike route that I couldn't see him...I felt like, OMG my little man is out there all on his own!!

He then came zooming in and the moment he was off his bike and they had his helmet off he was GONE for the run....in fact I only got a picture of his back! LOL! Then my husband ran along him to catch up with him and be with him....I love the picture I have of them running together :) xoxoxox

So I sat at the finish line waiting for him to cross. As he came running in he looked good,strong and fast and had a smile on his face. The race announcer even said, And coming into the finish line is NICHOLASSSSSS VAN EGMONDDDDDDD!!!" He crossed the finish line with such a smile of joy and got his medal.

With tears in my eyes I hugged him and told him, "OMG that was amazing!!! You did it all by yourself!"....I was just SO impressed with him. He told me that he liked doing it on his own and really had fun......awesome :-)

My first Conference

So this past weekend (Fri - Sat) I went to my first Personal Trainer Conference. I went because in order to stay a registered personal trainer I need to get 7 CEC credits. So going to this conference for the two days gave me 14...enough to be renewed for 2yrs. To tell you the truth I was feeling really intimidated about it. I thought it was going to be a tits and muscles show kind of show and that everyone was going to be sizing each other up. Think about those crazy fit, ripped people you see in the gym...that's what I thought I was going to be surrounded with for two days. But I was ready to go in and stand my ground for the 'normal' guy :) I am happy to report that it was nothing like that at all!!!....all different types of awesome people were there from young to old and fit to unfit! I looked around the room and was amazed at all the 'normal' people that were there. I felt like I fit in...not at the top or at the bottom but right in the middle. To me this was a sign that I am where I should be and am on the right path. It was great!! Everyone was SO positive and friendly...which I find most people who are into fitness and health are. I learned a lot of awesome fun things, the funniest class I took was where we did the exercise. And any of you that know me it won't surprise you to hear that I put all I had into doing the exercise, while others just went through the motions. I was lucky to have been paired up with a guy named Ross who liked to go hardcore just as much as I do. We had a blast!! We were sweaty, hot and laughing the whole class. As partners we had a belt around the person's waist in front and while they tried to run/side step/back walk & bear crawl across the floor the person behind would hold the end of the belt and try to stop them. It was hilarious!!! I was pulling that guy back across the floor as he tried with ALL his might to move forward and he did the same to me.....at the end we only had high fives/smiles and congrats on a awesome workout. One of the people watching even said to us, " You two were the best out there and SO fun to watch!" Anyone else that I partnered up with or eat lunch with, where all up beat, friendly and very helpful with tips and ideas and sharing their experience with me. After those two days I feel more confident in what I am doing, excited to learn more and positive I am headed in the right direction :)

Recipe'o the Month ~ Juicing

Ok so this month I tried something different and did some 'juicing'! I borrowed a girlfriends juicer and bought a bunch of fruit and veggies and told the kids we were going to make some juice. "Do we get to drink it too?!" is what they asked! LOL! we don't have juice in our house (poor children) so this was a treat for them. In fact juice and pop was the first thing that we stopped having in the house 3yrs ago. When I realized how many empty calories I was consuming by drinking juice I stopped. I use to drink a jug of juice to myself in 1-2 days!!! :/

So the kids and I tried all different kinds of combo's but in the end the winners were.....just straight carrot, carrot/apple mix, carrot/spinach mix and the all time winner was the orange/strawberry mix :P I know some people juice everyday but truthfully for me I don't think I will be able to do that because of two reasons, 1. it was pretty messy and 2. the cost to buy the extra food to juice.....I liked the experience and so did the kids. It's defiantly something that I will do in the future as a 'treat' again :)

Checking out CrossFit

So I have been hearing about CrossFit for awhile and been wanting to try it out....just another way to step it up and learn more fun things to do to stay active and fit. Bob Harper, the trainer from the Biggest Loser has really gotten into it this last year and I have learned some things from him about it to. I even took a WOD (work out of the day) that he did on a little YouTube video and did it at the park one time....it made me feel like I was going to puke it worked me SO hard!!...I of course LOVED IT!!!....not the wanting to puke part, but working through feeling uncomfortable and sticking to what I said I would do and finishing it...I like that part. I also find that, that feeling over flows into other parts of my life as well with other things that I am doing :) So CrossFit Altitude offered Momstown a free trail class and I jumped at the chance...it even ended up that day that I was not only going to have my 3yr but two other friends 3yrs as well with me...so I borrowed my moms car seat and off I went to CrossFit with 3 3 year olds in tow!! LOL!! That's how serious I was about wanting to try this (plus they had a kids area where someone played with them while I worked out!) So it was really cool...just as I thought it would be. The instructor was great and really into doing things the right way and with goos form....CorssFit has sometime gotten a bad rap because people have gotten hurt doing it, but that is because they aren't doing it right or are not being taught well. She went through some different moves and I learned some new things...which I love and got me excited about learning more, getting better and getting stronger at this....a new challenge!...YES PLEASE! Something that has come out of this whole journey for me is learning to live WITH fear and not IN it!...this means...before I would be scared about doing things so I wouldn't do them...fear has robbed me of many chances, experiences and goals that I could have had in my life. Today, the fear is still there but it doesn't stop me anymore, I still go and do it. This seems to also have given me confidence in myself and that I CAN do things I have never done before. I have learned to ask for help, admit that I need help or that I don't understand something and even ask questions until I do understand them...well who knew that, that was a good way to learn new things and have fun doing them!! LOL! So hear I am doing my first dead lift at CrossFit....hardcore baby!! LOL!!

And here I am doing what they call a knees to elbow...these are f'n hard and I did them during the workout for 30sec for 3 rounds and I didn't stop during those 30 sec...I wasn't sure if I could or not, thought I'd at least try and I DID IT!!! :-O

Something I really like about the CrossFit way is that I don't just Do it...like at a gym how you follow the teacher...instead I have to LEARN it, I take on the responsibility of what I am doing. They post the WOD and you have to go do it...they have classes as well, but in general I have to work my mind along with my body. I will leave you with the #1 mantra they have in CrossFit cause I really like it and it can apply to ALL areas of my life ~ I WILL PROMISE TO DO MY BEST. MY BEST WILL VARY FROM DAY TO DAY, FROM HOUR TO HOUR, FROM MINUTE TO MINUTE, I WILL DO THE VERY BEST I CAN!

It's time to start Tri-ing again :)

Woo Hoo! I am So excited for Triathlon training this summer! First off I do have to say that I am pretty sad that our Assistant Coach from the following years is not going to be able to join us this year :(.......I remember at the beginning of 2010 when Krista posted on the Momstown message board, "Who wants to train for a Triathlon with Mommy's in Motion!?".....I really liked the name of the group because that what I was becoming...a mommy in motion. So my brain said,"YES!", my body said,"OH DEAR!, then fear piped up and said, "No frigg'n way can you do THAT!" and then this new little voice in my head said, "Screw you all! We ARE doing this!!!" OMG! OMG! OMG!!! Krista was there every night with such a beautiful smile to show us, a confidence that it will be ok and that I could do it (something I didn't have yet) and an excitement and love for the sport that couldn't help but rub off on me :) She is one of me main 'people' that have been an important part of my journey. So our first get together for Mommy's & Babe's in Motion was last night and this year I will be trying to fill Krista's shoes as Assistant Coach! AHHHH! SO excited and honoured, I was almost in tears when I told my husband that I was going to be 'Coach Gail' for the team. His reply was, "No you are going to be Coach Awesome!" LOL!!! as a congrats he made me a jacket with iron on letters saying, "Coach Awesome" on the back and "Awesome" down the arm! How wicked is THAT!!!

So last night was SO fun! We had more newbies come out last night and that always makes me excited! I am excited for them on the journey they are about to embark on and the growth, learning and empowerment that comes with it. although they all look like I did on my first night...like a dear caught in headlights! LOL!....I feel their fear, their unknowing, their questioning themselves and the uncertainty...I feel it because I know it, that's what I had too. But now after going through it I now KNOW how ok and AWESOME it will be and I find myself telling these ladies, "TRUST me! It WILL be ok!...we will take this one week at a time together and it's going to be awesome!"